HEADLINES, DEEP FEBRUARY

If you think it's been slow around these parts lately, take heart in the headlines of the Park Rapids Enterprise of late.

A rumor made a bunch of high schoolers skip school;

(interesting omission of "on" from that headline)

an area resident turned 100;

(the lady still lives in her house and reads a book a day)

and no news is, apparently, still news.

Front page, people. This is some deep February.

From the Incidents report, all you need to know is that

An officer was requested for a "pretty heated basketball game" in Nevis;

and the cryptically ominous

A small black car was reported coming from the west at a high rate of speed.